i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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