This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize