We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
