Yo dont text me then not text me
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
i believe in u and ur pee
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
