He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
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if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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