I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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