We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
