I'm lost and stupid without you.
it's like iHOP with fire
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I think i got beer on your cat.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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