i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
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I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
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next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Use "feeling words"
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.