I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize