Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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