great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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