I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
