I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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