love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
