I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize