You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize