We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
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Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
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I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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