so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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