I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
she smelled like a LAN party
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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