people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize
