is your mom at the bar?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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