I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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