I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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