Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
