NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
