go do what you do best...puke behind churches
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
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