Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
babies were throwing up all over the place
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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