i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
