my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize