You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
