Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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