He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
