I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
