he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
