He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
