I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
