we're chasing vodka with high fives
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
