My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
