I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
porn star boner night. come get it.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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