well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
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