That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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