thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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