Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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