He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
