ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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