She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
