Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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