He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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