I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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